Amadeo Sogni

“By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day. “
Benjamin Franklin

So I am back at work…oh drat and bother. You know when people stop doing something, then they ease back into it. I wish my job was like that. I came back and got thrust right into work. At 9:10 I was on the phone with a woman explaining something I said to her when she was here two weeks ago…and the three times she called me on that day less than 30 minutes after the meeting. Then she talked to my boss while I was out. Then she called first thing on my first day back. The worse part is not that she keeps going over the same thing over and over. It’s the fact that she pause for an average of 3 minutes after every response you give. So a conversation that could take 10 minutes can easily stretch to 30. One day I’ll work in a way that I won’t have to talk to people. As a matter of fact here is a job position I will have open as soon as I get the budget.

Wanted:

Personal Assistant/Amadeo’s Right Hand

Potential applicants do not require a degree of any sort. Applicants must be able to type at least 40 wpm, have strong skills with Microsoft Office and be able to tell people they are idiots while speaking to them like the pea-brains they are. Amadeo (the hiring party) has little patience for stupid people. It will be your task to attend meetings and speak with people he does not want to. You will be briefed on his likes and dislikes and who he feels is stupid in advance. This will give the assistant the ability to tell individuals that their ideas are stupid and that Amadeo may have slapped their face into the desk for sharing them. Applicants must be willing to walk out of meetings in an abrupt manner and call Amadeo with the hilarious details of the third parties stupidity. It is your job to minimalize the amount of stupidity I have to deal with. In some cases you will be empowered to slap these fools. In order to balance your work environment, you will attend meetings with myself and people who have sense most especially lunch and dinner meetings. You will also be privy to any investment opportunities that are made available to me. Amadeo’s right hand will be treated as a valued member of the team and not just hired help. Feel free to question me as I have no respect for yes men/women. Be notified that stupidity is grounds for termination. Prior office experience required. Knowledge of pressure points and martial arts preferred. Ability to put your goon hand down is required.