“If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.”
George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)

So while I planned to spend alot of time in nothing but my boxers drinking coffee and calling friends while they were at work…I had some interesting events unfold during my vacation. One long one and one that was really an interlude. I will detail them as such.

Saturday, April 28th: 1st day off
So I go to see the fam and they inform me that my cousin (19 year old female) has been missing since that tuesday, she vanished and the basement door was left open. Her mother indicates that she has been seeing a young man who is a drug addict, was put out by his parents and is a general ne’er do well. Since I know some people who know some people I make it my personal mission to track them down, beat his ass and drag her home (at least so she can be confronted). I leave and proceed to get info.

Thursday, May 3: 6th day off
I go to see Meshell Ndegeocello at the 9:30 club. W. Ellington Felton opened up and did a long set. Despite me having dug him in the past on the open mic tip, I didn’t feel the show that much. He also brought Raheem DeVaughn out (That nigga tried to holla at my date! Well it was 4 years ago, but I knew him and he knew me! How you gonna roll up while D.Chase was talking to me?!?!). Anyway…so it takes like an hour or more for her to come out and in that time the D.J. spins. When she stayed on the house music for a while that was when I noticed that heterosexuals (us) were the minority. I don’t have a problem being in a crowd of gay folks…my problem was these cats were exhibitionists. Like: “Could you not make out so hard, you’re elbowing me” types. This one girl had her asscrack on my arm for 10 minutes! I would have thought it was extreme flirting if her girl friend hadn’t been grinding on her so hard. Plus she bent over twice; once to take off her shoes and once to put them back on…did not help the situation. I ended up in a horse stance with my elbows spread to keep people off me. That’s the thanks I got for not going mosh pit when the Dj played Nirvana songs. So Ndegeocello comes out and then does a reaaaaaaaaal short set. They get her to come out again and she picks up the bass and they rock out some more, then she leaves two minutes later. I took the hint, but the rest of the crowd was waiting for her to come back out…dummies. So alot of people left pissed…my roommate cause she’s short and people kept block her view ( a reason I don’t let people at shows slide in past and get infront of me. I was just glad to get that girls ass crack away from me. I can’t believe I didn’t research the crowd first!

Saturday May 5th: 8th day off
So the fam calls and says that there will be a gathering on saturday…I say I’ll come without asking what it’s about. My grandmother does let me know she talked to my cousin, my cousin got married and the dude is not a junkie. O.K. So around 11:00 on saturday I realize this party is for the newlyweds. What I also find out is…alot:
1) My aunt has told my cousin she is no longer part of the family.
2) My family had the party sans my aunt to say, “she tripping yeah you’re still part of the family”.
3) Dude was not put out by his parents; his father and brother died and he and his mother live together (I did not mean to say with…but that’s coming up).
4) Dude did a tour in Iraq.
5) Dude may smoke some weed, but he’s not even a weedhead.
6) He plays video games professionally.
7) He and his mom got money from the death of the father and brother and went half on a $500, 000 home (that me and my same age cousin went to and that shit is niiiiiice, that cat’s liquor cabinet is stacked with quality drinks!).
8) He is actually real cool and intelligent (glad I didn’t find him and beat his ass first).
9) My aunt has her kids in the house on some What’s Eating Gilbert Grape shit - and she’s a large woman. I guess my cousin saw her out and took it.
10) While getting married at 19 may not be the move…if dude had a sister I would move my ass in with her…that house is nice as hell.
11) While my mothers generation of this family doesn’t really drink, mine sure does.
12) I used to think one of my other aunts was wild…I realized she’s just willing to wild out and then come back to earth. It’s the mother of this cousin who is really the wild one, when I think back on the past I should have known.

All this and I didn’t even see Spiderman 3 yet, nor did I find a woman to let me lay on her bosom whilst she rubbed my hair…dammit. C’est la vie, nothing ever goes according to plan.