“The man who has confidence in himself gains the confidence of others.”
Hasidic Saying

So you got in the door and you’re seated at the table…now you need to know what the hell do you want. I have not thrown you to the wolves. I guess if I can share some knowledge then I should. So I took you guys through meeting and courting, but that was easy. This is the harder part. Presenting yourself.

My man Aswad() once said that what you want is to choose the person who’s choosing you. But who do you want to choose? Like attracts like and all you can control is you and your choice.

Posture:

I am the prize.
Yeah I said it, not to be egostistical or anything. This is the way I think when I’m dealing with a woman. I know my worth and therefore what I can’t accept in exchange for it. Naturally, being the prize, I want someone who is a prize themselves. When you win the Superbowl, you don’t compare yourself to the cats with the first draft pick do you? I think not.

Show me:
I always see these articles, posts and so on and so forth about what a woman wants in a man. A list of the things he needs to have to be with her. Gentleman, you need a list of your own. I always think of Mahogany: “She said she’d have my kids and help me make my next G…”. I’m quick to say all I can give you is me…but we can build something together.

I will never Lie (No Immature):
Never lie. I mean ever. If your game is strong you never have to. If you want things a certain way, put it down and see if she can pick it up. If she ain’t with it then she’s not the one you want. I mean just playing the odds, if you walked up to every woman you were attracted to and told them you wanted to get them alone with Saran wrap, a bow tie, honey, a python, a video camera and 5 candles…eventually one of them would be interested. Not that I get down like that. I’m just saying if you know what you want and present it, someone will be in the same place that you are. Lying to get what you want only causes problems later. You don’t need that drama.

Couth:

Ain’t my type of hype (ohhh-o- ohhhh-o):
Hype - your just the type of propaganda in the land of supply and demand a…pardon me. Theory is this: if you’d regret getting a particular woman pregnant because of who she is, DO NOT SLEEP WITH HER. Quality over quantity my friends. Despite the fact that it’s treated like a recreational activity, the purpose of sex is procreation. Keep that in mind. Besides, this minimizes potential drama with a woman anyway. Consider the traits of a bad mother, at their base are traits that make bad girlfriends, wives and even flings…don’t get your pet rabbit boiled.

Just Say No:
Look, I know you’re horny and I know that girl may be interested, but don’t do it (remember - you had to eliminate your desire?). I mean for real. Who wants something that everyone’s had? By that I meant you. Make sure she’s worth it (and not in a if-it’s-free-it’s-me kinda way) Plus I recommend that every man either pass up or turn down sex at some point in their life. It builds character. By the way, I don’t just mean, “Oh she didn’t look that good so I passed it up.” I mean yeah she looks good, but I still didn’t do it. People will probably never believe you…women especially. Despite the hatred that prevails in regards to dog-like behavior, not fulfilling that role will really mess with peoples minds. If you do this be prepared to be insulted, have your manhood challenged and a few other bad things. Principle here is this: when a woman says no men are taught that no matter what’s going on you stop…so if a woman can’t respect you saying no, you should be looking at the front door.

Silent Bob and that Gay Dude were right:
Even if you are a Sexual God there are certain things you can’t forget. Unless a woman was raised on a desert island by Amazon women, she’s probably not a virgin. In fact she’s probably done something (or someone or everything) that may bother you. At least it will if you go in with the wrong idea. When I’m with a woman this is a mantra that I say to myself: She’s had smarter guys with bigger dicks, more money, a better place, a better car, who were in better shape had more education and spoke more languages…but she’s with me. It’s one thing to know you’re the prize, it’s another to think you are automatically the end all, be all of her world. That’s something you put in work for.

Action:

I Believe:
I don’t care what you are doing, two things will get you through it all, confidence and the ability to laugh at yourself. I dance at anything you can dance at. I’m not the best dancer, but the confidence with which I step out onto the floor makes it hard to fade me. I will start dancing when no one else is…and people will follow me. Then on the other end if I’m doing something and I mess up in some way I’ll laugh louder than anyone else. It’s impossible to embarrass someone who’s already laughing at themselves.

Freeze Vodka:
That cool. Now despite how cool I know I am (yeah I said it, what you wanna do? Ain’t nothing but space and opportunity between us), when I say cool I really mean composed. When things fall apart, you stay together. Flipping out over anything isn’t really good. I have learned that you do have to make exceptions for positive things in regards to women sometimes. It makes people feel better to see your happiness and know you’re with them. People don’t always like the calm person in a crisis during a crisis, but they remember who kept their head later on. Most importantly is coming across ex-boyfriends, male friends, fathers and so forth. Don’t let anyone shake you. Additionally, don’t exaggerate yourself to show that you’re confident…it proves you arent’.

See Everything:
If you can become omnipotent, well than you shouldn’t need my advice - matter of fact call me and give me some. Too bad you can’t, butwhat you can do is pay attention. For instance: one fine, broke sunday me and my girl were walking around this little festival-ish thing in Charles Village and this dude who owns a shop is selling jewlery. She remarks on something. I grunt as if to say, “it’s not football, I don’t really care”. We keep moving, I dip off later drop some cash on it and come back in a couple weeks to pay it off. It was all smiles when that gift was given. I’ve done that same thing over a greater period of time. Those gifts do two things: 1) They please the person cause it is something they wanted. 2) They help that person realize that the things they say matter to you. You’re not at the gift giving point yet, but this comes in even handier during the inital period.