“Sometimes when you look back on a situation, you realize it wasn’t all you thought it was. A beautiful girl walked into your life. You fell in love. Or did you? Maybe it was only a childish infatuation, or maybe just a brief moment of vanity.”
Henry Bromel

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: “You little scumbag! I got your name, I got your ass! You will not laugh, you will not cry, you will learn by the numbers I will teach you. Now get up, get on your feet! You had best un-fuck yourself or I will unscrew your head and shit down your neck!”

Jesus Jumped Up Palomino! Why do I have to keep on going over things over and over again? When will these dudes learn? I’m about to put together some pamphlets and start passing them out. Or better yet I’ll give some cards to women so when lame dudes ask for their number they can give them my card and I’ll stage an intervention or something. So anyway, the latest takes place in my office. There is a new employee who is an attractive young lady so of course dudes are all in her face…including my clients. I’m really just laughing at them cause I’m sure that a young college graduate who drives a Benz and manages a Main Street program is really in the market for an underage, unemployed, GED student that lives with his momma. The real issue is this: everyday since Monday she has found roses on her car. No name, no note. I immediately shook my head and wanted to print out a copy of my previous lesson, find this guy and sit him down until he memorizes it. On the third day he did place his business card in the roses, after his identity had pretty much been determined already. So here is why this is a bad idea:

First off it may seem like a romantic building of mystery, but (as perhaps some of my female readers can attest to) there is also a negative side.
Negative thoughts as follows -

What if it’s someone I don’t want to deal with at all?
What if this dude is a creepy stalker?
How much is this person watching me?

I’ve mentioned that I don’t like to give roses, but I’ll explain why once more. In the hiearchy Roses are at the top, but there are some recent drawbacks.

1) You can get Roses anywhere: 7 - 11, Mexican dudes on the side of the road, dudes than sell them at clubs, etc. It ain’t hip to pay for your flowers and a slurpee at the same time.
2) Everybody gives Roses. I mean damn, show a little originality. Do you know how many kinds of flowers there are out there?

My thing is before you give anything present yourself. If she ain’t feeling you, you can find out then and there. If after that you make up your mind to go on a win her over campaign, that’s your choice. Maybe it will work, but I’m sure you’ve got less of a chance if you show up after the flowers and she’s not feeling you. You can’t warm up to a total stranger. Also leaving them on the car parked on the same block as her job sucks. I’d say send them to her actual job. It says, “I’m feeling you” while leaving it on the car hints of, “I know where you are and where you’re going later”. That’s not a good look. If you had sent it to her office you would have also built some props for yourself with her co-workers. Now they’re looking out to make sure you don’t get snatched as you go to your car. Get it together fellas.