“Sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast. “
Lewis Carroll (1832 - 1898)
So…my ace was shot recently. He was up in D.C. and turning down the wrong side street ended with .44 slugs being propelled through his car. He was able to get away, but not before he took one through his leg. Being that we’re similar in nature I should have known that because he said he was alright did not make it so. I found out this morning that he has nerve damage and may not be able to use that leg. That’s normally bad, but he’s a very physical person (as is the nature of his business) so that compounds the issue. What’s really getting me about this whole thing is what I thought. My first reaction was, “We’re too old for this” and not in a Danny Glover way. See I according to statistics a young black male is ver susceptible to death from a gun shot wound until he’s 26. So when I turned 26 I celebrated the fact that I had made it out of that range. Not long afterwards I started seeing the trends that the age had increased to 28. A month from now I’ll be 29, a little more than a week later my ace will be 30. I thought we were out. I thought we had made it. This bothered me. What bothered me even more is that I have begun to think of getting shot as something that happens to young people. Acne, puberty and bullet wounds. Proms and paramedics. I admit to the sickness of that line of thinking, but I also have to address the truth of it. That it’s much more likely for a young black male to be shot than anyone else. I can think of times in our lives when, while not at the forefront, the possibility of being shot was there. I can think of times that I counted myself blessed that I hadn’t been shot. Near misses and lucky escapes. All of those could be forgotten in the space of a day as I went on about my routine. Just accepting it as a part of life. I thought we were past it. I thought that we had seen the danger zone and made our way through it. I was wrong. I forgot that it wasn’t just the age, it was the people. So those most likely to shoot one of us is growing older with us. It’s just the ones younger than us are more likely than ever to shoot one another. But my graduating class has not left it behind…we probably never will. The glasshouse of my perception is shattered.

I’m gonna live till I die! I’m gonna laugh ’stead of cry,

I’m gonna live, live, live, until I die!

Frank Sinatra